K.M. had some interesting things to say about my query after I won a critique in a contest she had on her blog Moomurs. The dilemma being, as I see it, how much to give away in a query, how much to hold back to pep up the intrigue level. Anyway, in addition to Query Version 4.0 I now have Version 4.0B and come January I'll split my querying between the two versions and see what difference it makes, if any.
I've also decided that I need to really redo my synopsis in a narrative fashion to replace the sort of blow-by-blow type I've now got. That's my holiday writing task.
What most concerns me, though, is my first chapter. I like it. My beta readers liked it -- or at any rate, none of them told me it sucked. But is it turning off those agents who've had partials and fulls or the first few pages? Or is it something else? The elusive "voice"? Or ... or what? Without any feedback, I don't know.... I might rewrite the whole thing and only do myself damage. It's exceedingly frustrating, my dear friends.
I am going to go through the whole manuscript again over the holidays, in addition to doing another synopsis. One of my friends finally coughed up a list of errors/oddities he'd found, and though I'd been through the ms. at least a dozen times, I'd missed a couple of real dumb errors -- writing "surgical sutures" when I'd meant "surgical tubing" and saying someone had a "kung fu mustache" when I meant "Fu Manchu mustache."
I mean, that last one is pretty embarrassing.